Bjork understands

come to me
i'll take care of you
protect you
calm, calm down
you're exhausted
come lie down
you don't have to explain
i understand
you know
that i adore you
you know
that i love you
so don't make me say it
it would burst the bubble
break the charm
jump off
your building's on fire
i'll catch you
i'll catch you
destroy all
that is keeping you down
and then i'll nurse you
i'll nurse you
come to me
i'll take care of you
you don't have to explain
i understand
i can not live
peacefully without you
for even a moment
l miss you terribly
when you're away
he's away
this ain't right
i'm alone
i'm taking an aeroplane
across the world
to follow my heart
how come out of all the people
in the world
only one
can make me complete
one word on the phone
makes me happy
but one touch directly
makes me ecstatic
he's away
this ain't right
i'm alone
i'm taking an aeroplane
across the world
to follow my heart


we live on a mountain
right at the top
there's a beautiful view
from the top of the mountain
every morning i walk towards the edge
and throw little things off
like:car-parts, bottles and cutlery
or whatever i find lying around
it's become a habit a way
to start the day
i go through this before you wake up
so i can feel happier
to be safe up here with you
it's real early morning
no-one is awake
i'm back at my cliff
still throwing things off
i listen to the sounds they make
on their way down
i follow with my eyes 'til they crash
imagine what my body would sound like
slamming against those rocks
and when it lands
will my eyes
be closed or open?
i'll go through all this
before you wake up
so i can feel happier
to be safe up here with you
bjork..various


for matthew
someday when you are here again I will show you how much
it takes to make this real, no more secrets, no more pain, just a beautiful dream that remains you are my heart beating wildly my eyes gazing out onto the skin the fingers pushing into and burying themselves within take it all take it all divine one all gurus and teachers were at once students and beliving and doing created their new life take it all take it all from inside and out I cry letting the tears fall where they may breaking away the crust and finding a new inside let it be..let it be.theresa2/28/05

wishes

My Wish is this

to have strength

compassion

love uncompromising

yet without limits

unconditional

to be brave

loving to myself

thoughtful

patient

aware of my dreams

conciousness unending

to have faith and hope

to remember that there is time

to be easy on myself but move forward

to hold on to my passions

whatever they may be

willing, useful and light

moderate in thought and deeds

responsible

young at heart

and mind

but wise

may all your wishes come true ....

work on them. I will too.

I

YOU

LOVE

Matthew

STILL

If they only knew

If they only knew

would they love you still

If I told the truth

could I lift my head again

You have so far to fall

yet not so far at all

all the thoughts we share

couldnt even begin to redeem us

Would it matter if you were real

and whole, complete like my dream

I am so far from done here

yet my soul is weary and wavering

inside of me,

Do we deserve eachother

is this clear enough for you

reading books all day long

down on hands and knees

filling my eyes with flowers

and white, blue, and red.

Your side here is empty again

but was it ever full at all

or just an illusion of faith

one more day, step in time

in and out breathing

this is the way..

I cannot be a refuge

there is no warmth in my

cold cold heart, just listen

to the echos

moving fingers playing rhymes

take the leap, never again

this is my mountain

my ashram to sit upon

the stars will guide

the sun will shine

and I will survive

New Day

Out from the piles and pillows I crawl

into the light and the dawn

Making my way to the mirror I saw

a face that is weary and drawn

The mourning doves call takes

me back to the places of long ago

memories still

So much to remember,

And more to forget, sure wish

that I had a new pill

Stronger and faster my heart

is becoming, but me

where is it I'm going?

To the light, to the air

the freedom of knowing

truth in all its glory

so for me on this day

its a brand new story

Of hope and redemption

of love and compassion

of dreams and forgiving

of life and of living

this path is so hard

as it always should be

but damn the scenery is great.

Thank you,for this.

"Underneath"

Sometimes it's hard when you're so deep inside

To see all you can lose in a blink of an eye

Dreams could be shattered

You could be gone

How would I survive

Cause you're where I belong

My soul-believer

Without you,

I don't know who I would be

Underneath,

I can feel you move through me

Inside out, you surround me

I breathe you like I'm taking my last breath,

you're everything I know

So how could I let you go

Sometimes I listen to a voice that isn't mine

I disconnect from everything inside

And I have made choices

And wasted all the days

I could have been with you

Where my heart stayed

I know you've waited faithfully

Blessing our love even stronger

I've been blessed

For every kiss

For every breath

And I've been touched,

By hands I trust

My love is risen

how could I let you

How could I let you go

(J.S.2003)

Matthew

Darling, where are you now
how can I find you,
here inside the sun is setting and I am lonely
breath is harsh and slow
you in my mind are quiet
but here in my heart so loud
take me away from this solitude,
and show me the dawn
break from me nothing
share in my state
live with my lover
be brave and wait
take my hand as I watch
and then begin again
with me
lowly shadow in my eye
remind you
of time

mi amo aeturnes

Sometimes I am caught by a great emotion

falling by the side of my heart

reaching out in the dark

brushing the hair from eyes

touching cheek

breathing deep

I can see you so clearly

feel your beat

transformed I am

as you are

miracle o miracle

I cry with joy

falling again..

from heaven we decend

taking off our skin

and being so free

never leave this

dare not take it away

still I am, next to you

heart heart heart

oooo, I am so full

of everything that is

and ever was...thank you.

Yes, surrender

Sometimes when you least expect it ,, you finally find the answer
To all those questions deep inside
however you come upon it

let it happen, dont fight it

maybe you will feel that the world

is broken, or tipping in a new direction

than you have ever gone before,

maybe the light seems a little stronger

or the passage of time reaches out

in a different way..

no matter,,

let it go, happen, become

whatever it will be

it will take you and turn you

but you will be free..

What is love

Love is gracious and kind..

or so they say,

Never ending, compassionate

long suffering....

Am I love are you?

I used to think on love

as something, but now

I know it is everything

without it nothing would

exist, so I am love and

so are you, we and all that

is ..is love

I have given myself over to it

because there is no other way

to live it be it survive it

you must let it have you

completely, and know that it

will not hurt you..you will only

hurt yourself if you try to fix

it, or change it, or make it into

something else..

when i am love i feel nothing bad,

no fear, pain, or suffering

just wholeness and light

it is so beautiful, If only

I could hold it ....but

then

it would dissapear

so with open hands and heart

I just trust it believe it

let it be...me

amen

Be Careful



tread light

speak softly

close your eyes

take a breath

hold it tight

Let it slam

spit it out

breath deeper

Scream

LOUD

Take one look

in that glass

watch yourself

minutes pass

by the way

I cant tell

if you really

know it

but inside me

is a bomb

ticking faster

waiting

Dont even try

let it go

listen to it

feel it

growing deep

crawling out

watch your step

again..

I will find you

make you cry

tear you up

wring you out

make a statement

tell the truth

brave and silent

I am you

You wont listen

open your eyes

look inside

find the lie

break your heart

fall right down

you wont take

this time

is out

When I see

it on the dust

covered up

its not much

to look at this

you would think

there is nothing

but finally

you see.

whats the word?

What can I say to make it better

What can be done to help you live

How can it quiet the thunder inside me

Or find a reason for all of our sins

what are we doing

why are we here

how can it be like this

If I just say I'm sorry

will it all be ok

or maybe just nothing

is there to fix

Why do I tremble

or cry or worry

about you when you dont even care

or maybe I'm wrong again

and misunderstood

the battle lines seemed so clear

Scarlet red is all I see

and visions cloud my eyes

I shake and pray like

a devotee of some God

that isnt even mine

Wanting it all seems

to be the problem

the root of the evil

the divine

but here it is staring at me

and I cant say I'm sorry

or take it back

even if it wasnt given

just know that its truth

and hope and light

all that I want for you

maybe I am selfish

or cant find the right

way, to say what I feel

anymore

who thought that words would fail me

yet here we are.

with this ring

With this ring

I am bound

to bring myself

to sorrow

with this word

I am found

to be the one

without tommorrow

with this thought

I can't find

another way

to let you go

with this dream

my heart breaks

just one more

I told you so

With this day

I hope to find

a reason here

to ease my mind

With goodbye

I hope you see

the love I have

for you and me

With this ring

my life is given

to you alone

my heart is driven

to endless nights

and days and days

of prayers for you

to find the ways

to be yourself

to be as one

it should be simple

even fun

my only wish

from here is this

that you will see

you are my bliss

With this hope

I will give up

and be myself

and take my cup

of wisdom I am

surely without

but here I am

without a doubt

always yours

you love so well

never let me

forget to tell

its just so sad

because I know

this stupid ring

has got to go

Not from my

finger

not from my head

but from my idea

of love instead

to just surrender

to just believe

that what

we have

is love

indeed.

drips

ahhhhhhhh 

Drip Drip Drip

I fall through the cracks

I listen and I learn

not to lean

not to burn

its all the same now

it doesnt really matter

you are on through me

and I am alone

where, I dont envy you

with your path

with your punishment

you bleed, I suffer

you torment, I dream

its all the same

no matter

I cant believe it anymore

but in truth my heart

beats ,,still ..finally

drip drip drip...

I fall through the walls

and into the halls

and over and under and below myself again

you are the light to my heart

but the darkness of the world

I cringe and bear the weight of it

so much to see, but not enough

I am alive and well, I am free

you are not. sorry.

sand

it covers me
its like my skin

blood and sweat
all over

hard and strong
lasts forever

never leaves me
completely

waves crash
as I listen

to the sound
of my heart

darkness fall
upon my eyes

never alone
just always

part of me

Gathering
underneath

rolling over
to the sea

bringing
treasure

unknown

alive and
free

moving forward
and back

save some
for later

feel it
bite

endless

sand 

13

I was always told that 13 was an

unlucky number

but I never believed it till now

13 years, gone by so fast

in the blink of an eye

and yet so long ago it seems

I was warned, wasnt it so,

that 13 wasnt the time to go

off chasing dreams or finding myself

it suddenly means

that 13 is not for me

Maybe 14 will be better

if I try a little more

and keep on dreaming and believing,

maybe one more year in store

for us, we hope that its just the beginning..

so no more running, no more sinning

13 days, 13 hours, 13 minutes how much more

will it take to see you again,

here upon my door

Here is where I'm waiting,

going nowhere fast

standing there before you,

I thought that it would last

Not giving up here, not this time

in my heart is where you are ....there you're only mine

So as you go out into the world,

and find the answers there

remember 13 years ago,

and know how much I care

always yours is how I'm made,

cause 13 isnt enough just yet

Here I am and Here Ive stayed,

never ever forget.
what a life....